Merriam Webster dictionary defines Unrequited as: Not reciprocated or returned in kind. (Unrequited Love)

You will get through this.

In some unrequited love situations the beloved may not be aware of the admirer’s strong romantic affections. A breakup is different.

A breakup can be one of the hardest pyschological circumstance a person faces in their lifetime.  The hard-wired human desire to reconcile and get back together with the one they love can be insatiable and as hard to overcome as any severe addiction; physical or otherwise.  After a breakup, you may find yourself desparately missing your ex and wanting them back. Unfortunately, you more than likely will be faced with an unrequited love scenerio. The expressions of love you show not being returned now. You may want your ex back with all your heart.  But you are needing to face the reality of no longer simply calling your ex for friendly conversation or to make plans for the weekend. In fact, your options are limited after a breakup, because a breakup is a request by one person in the relationship to disengage from the relationship altogether.

What should you do to reconcile with your ex? According to the ZooMonkey principles, you need to follow the steps of re-attraction.

When you call us, we will happily help guide you through your breakup process. 1-888-666-1871

I miss her so bad it is hard for me to function.

1) Give Yourself Time to Miss Your Ex Within Reason- After a specific amount of time, you need to consciously tell yourself that anymore intense grieving and sorrow over your ex is unacceptable for your productive future.  Your own time period is set by you but there are some relative norms:

The general rule is it takes one half the time you were with your ex to get over your ex.  For instance if you were with your boyfriend for 4 years, it could take 2 full years to truly “get over him..”  However, do not let this formula worry you if you feel two years is a long time (in this instance).  We have ways to decrease this number by a fraction of the time when we speak to you about the ZooMonkey system for reconciliation and for getting over your ex.

By giving yourself some “healthy misery” time to miss your ex, you are allowing yourself to mourn in a healthy way and are not trying to speed up nature.  It is very natural to go through a grieving period after a breakup.  Do not beat yourself up over being upset.  If you “give yourself” this time to mourn, then you will find that the time goes by faster since are not as hard on yourself but make sure you have a target date to move on past it and try to take things day at a time.

2) Remove pictures and memorable items from site- Your brain is not a computer. You will absorb emotionally stimuli by pictures and nostalgic articles if they are lying around.  Do yourself a favor and remove these items.  You do not have to trash them, but remove them from plain site and don’t visit them after a period of time.  Everyone creeps on facebook on their ex’s page so it’s ok, but stop doing this also after a certain period of time. As in step one take it day at a time. Reward yourself with affirmations if you can go a day without looking at your ex’s pictures or facebook page or wherever.

You will eventually stop missing your ex but relax and give yourself some “me” time.

3) Don’t ask about your ex to mutual friends- Huge mistake.  The answers you get will never be to your satisfaction and you will find yourself wanting more information perhaps or the fact that you are asking will get back to y0ur ex which is highly unattractive if you are wanting to reconcile.  It’s ok to inquire on high level type questions to be nice on an occassion but never appear too interested or too concerned since you know your behavior will go directly back to your ex and you are then in a less optimal position for reconciliation.

The list goes on and on in terms of things you can do to stop missing your ex but don’t be too hard on yourself and know that human emotions are highly evolved and are really what differentiate us from animals.  It’s very natural and normal to have intense emotions about your ex but how you handle and express your emotions is up to you.  If you want to get your ex back, you are best advised to use a coach to help navigate through the emotions that get so many people in trouble when a simple tactic change could have meant the difference between reconciliation or staying away forever.

Please feel free to comment on this article as you wish.  We always enjoy your feedback, thoughts and input.

When you call us, we will help you decide where you are in your breakup 1-888-666-1871

If you are missing your ex and want to talk to us about getting your ex back, call us.  -Phil Richman